I’ve been re-reading my favorite Brené Brown books these days: Daring Greatly, The Gifts of Imperfection, and Rising Strong. Her words all the time feel so relevant and on point for me as an entrepreneur.
In Daring Greatly, she points to Teddy Roosevelt’s speech made April 23, 1910 in Paris:
It isn’t the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done higher. The credit belongs to the man who is definitely in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short repeatedly, because there isn’t a effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, no less than he fails while daring greatly, in order that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.”
I actually have this written on a scrap of paper in my studio so I can periodically read it and remind myself that entering into the arena of my work and life matters, and that on this space of the unknown, which will likely be out of my comfort zone, great growth as an individual and as an entrepreneur happens.
The Hard Truth
Unfortunately, I actually have also mis-interpreted these sensible words to be a mandate and excuse to be continually in the space where I’m covered with “dust, sweat and blood”. I actually have allowed myself to grow to be addicted to work and to busy-ness.
I’d like to say I’m modeling the good work ethic instilled in me by my parents. That my efforts are proof that I’m not one of ‘those cold and timid souls who knows neither victory nor defeat’.
Truthfully, nevertheless, I actually have come to realize that my never-ending pace and long work days are more of a necessity to prove something about myself that nobody is asking for: That I’m worthy of success.
The Benign Way It Begins
Three years ago once I began my journey and committed to creating my app and a product to match the high standards I envisioned for it, I said to my husband that we want to be prepared for this to take up loads of my time but that I promise to keep a handle on how much it affects our lives.
I felt a necessity to warn him about this because I do know myself. I’ve been a solopreneur for many of my profession and have worked as a freelancer and contractor for a very long time; working long and hard hours is just a component of entrepreneurial life, especially at the starting of a recent enterprise. Nevertheless, up until this current endeavor, I’ve been able to manage and (dare I say) balance my life pretty much. That every one modified last December when my app went survive the Apple App Store.
The high I felt seeing the fruits of my labor come to life was exhilarating, and like anything recent, I wanted to shout it from the mountain tops to let everyone know that my fabulous recent product was available for all to enjoy!
I dove head first into the marketing of my app, posting day by day and in search of advice from professionals. I went into research mode, watching videos and reading books and articles to gauge where to best apply my time and energy. All the while, I used to be starting the next phase of my app’s development and planning for the upcoming quarters’ growth.
My word for 2023 was ‘BUILD’, and I used to be taking that directive very seriously.
My mornings began early and I worked late into the evening. I forgot to eat loads of the time, and my husband began bringing food in to me to ensure that I ate. I kept assuring him that as soon as I got a handle on this or that, then I’d be back to living in the real world and doing normal things like watching a movie or television show in the evenings, seeing friends, and taking no less than someday of the weekend off.
After 6 months of this pace, I began to forget what my life looked like before. I used to be lucky to get 4-5 hours of sleep an evening, and once I was sleeping, I dreamt about my app and work. I finished going to my favorite classes at the gym and commenced excusing myself from get-togethers with friends because my head just wasn’t in a relaxed place to feel fully present with them.
I knew this wasn’t sustainable and that I needed to make some changes. I just needed to work out how to get off the crazy-train and arrange a recent system for myself.
“Crazy-busy, but Great”
‘Crazy-busy’ is an ideal armor, it’s an ideal way for numbing. What loads of us do is that we stay so busy, and so out in front of our life, that the truth of how we’re feeling and what we really want can’t meet up with us.” – Brené Brown
When anyone asked me how I used to be doing my auto-reply was, “crazy-busy, but great.”
Does this sound familiar?
I definitely was busy, but I obviously wasn’t great.
The Reckoning and the Rumble
In Rising Strong, Brené Brown talks about the Reckoning – “the process of calculating where you’re”; and the Rumble – the process of “owning” where you’re.
During my eighth month into my crazy-busy existence post launch, the Reckoning of my situation slapped me in the face. If changes weren’t made soon, I used to be going to reach burn-out on something I actually loved and was captivated with.
Once I had clarity that change needed to happen, it was time for me to have a hearty Rumble with what that change looked like.
The important thing to a very good Rumble is to take expectations, preconceived notions, and as much ego as you most likely can out of the arena as you assess your work, business practices, and life.
In business, we never want to feel vulnerable, especially as women, but the difficult truth is that in the space of vulnerability, you’re able to best recognize how the default actions that after seemed honorable, worthy, and obligatory are not any longer working.
Quite than numb what I didn’t want to feel (fear), I made a decision to take some motion steps toward the change that needed to happen.
Rumble Actions to Get You Began
Time Blocks, Rabbit Holes, and an Eagle’s Eye
The very first thing I needed to do was gain some perspective on just where and once I had grow to be so out of sync. I needed to observe my life with an ‘eagle’s eye’; a perspective from above that sees the big picture but additionally focuses on the parts and pieces and the way they work (or need to work) together.
I took an honest view of what my days looked like and the way I used to be expending my energy and time.
Here’s what I asked myself:
What are your Optimal Time Blocks (OTB)?
I’m a morning person, but unlike what I’ve been told for years – I don’t necessarily want to dive directly into work very first thing in the day. I actually prefer to get my exercise/work-out done in the morning, which generally puts me to work between 9:00-10:00 am.
My peak focus time for creativity and productivity is highest from 10:00am – 4:00pm. Those are the hours once I feel the most expansive. I even have the most energy during these hours.
From 4:00-6:00 pm I actually have less openness in my mind but still feel energized to keep working, so those hours are best for returning emails, bookkeeping and banking, filing, and data entry. After 6:00 pm, I’m not typically feeling creative, so wrapping up any of my tasks from the previous block is sweet until I can stop for the day.
In gaining honest clarity on what my Optimal Time Blocks (OTBs) are, it was easy to see how my efforts for the previous eight months had gone so incorrect. I used to be working completely outside of my optimal state.
Everyone seems to be different and their OTB can be unique for them. My husband’s friend is an evening owl and his best time of the day is from 8:00 pm – 2:00 am. There’s no right or incorrect here, there’s just what is correct for you. Get clear on what your Optimal Time Blocks are and work inside them.
What are Your Rabbit Holes?
Once I knew what my Optimal Time Blocks were, I used to be able to analyze how I spent those hours every day. I quickly saw that I’m easily distracted by Rabbit Holes – particularly when doing my marketing.
Rabbit Holes for me are typically in the form of emails, texts, and social media posts.
Once I watched my behavior over just a few days, I caught myself complaining that ‘I don’t have any time’. Once I broke my hours down, nevertheless, I spotted that the time I did have was often spent chasing shiny objects down side streets of texts and emails or in comfortable corners of Instagram and Pinterest to avoid doing the harder thing I needed to do.
Step one to breaking the Rabbit Hole cycle is to discover what yours are and create barriers around your time to keep those Rabbit Holes closed off and out of your OTB until you’re free and clear to let yourself jump in for a bit of side-tracked fun.
For me, that meant I needed to restrict myself from going off on tangents once I did my marketing so I could stay on the right track. For you, it could mean not responding to an email until the article is written or the invoice is shipped or waiting to call back your sister until the submission is made.
Whatever it’s, setting clear expectations on your efforts inside your Optimal Time Block is what matters. Rabbit Holes are fun, but should you can learn to control yours, you’ll find that there may be loads more time in the day to get work done.
Know Your Why and Adopt a ‘Should Do’ Weight loss plan
Once I began my business, my vision was clear and my focus was direct, but after the launch of my app, I discovered myself listening less often to my instincts and an excessive amount of to other people’s ‘should do’ lists for me.
The lists of ‘should do’s’ ranged from marketing to funds, and most were well intended, but once I took the time to step back to remember the ‘why’ behind my business, I used to be able to see that what works for others will not be best for my business. I needed to return to my gut to determine where and the way my efforts and time needed to be spent to best optimize the growth I wanted to see.
It’s vital for you to know your ‘why’ – why you created your enterprise, what your expectations for it were then, and what your expectations are for it now. Knowing this stuff helps you filter out the ‘should do’s’ that don’t serve your directive.
End Your Day
Prior to understanding my OTB, I never had an outlined end to my day. Because of that, I’d work late into the night every night. It wasn’t on occasion; it was all the time. I began to get headaches and my sleep was tousled.
Once I knew what hours of the day I needs to be working, I began to set stricter boundaries on once I would stop. My rule now could be to be done at around 6:00-6:30 pm. If I work later than that, it’s an exception, and if I can stop earlier, I do this too. This practice is empowering.
Set an ‘end’ time and stick to it. Try for per week and see how you are feeling.
Remove Thyself (at Least Once a Week)
This may occasionally appear to be an impossibility but I urge you to do it. All the previous steps didn’t mesh for me until I began taking no less than someday per week off from work. It could mean in the starting you will have to go someplace without cell reception or volunteer to help at a charity or non-profit somewhere or dive right into a house project like gardening or cleansing.
Whatever it’s for you, just make it a priority not to do your enterprise work. Listen to a recent podcast, enroll for a category to learn a recent skill, or go to a park and browse a book. Take the family for a beach day or have a leisure lunch with a friend. It doesn’t matter what it’s that you just do only that you just give attention to being present for the things in your life that steer you back to your center.
As the saying goes, ‘You can’t pour from an empty glass.’ Be sure that to give yourself time to refill and refuel no less than once per week.
Remember to Breathe and Enjoy the Ride
Starting a business is busy and the grind and hustle are par for the course, especially in the early years.
I actually have yet to hear any upstart’s story that claims otherwise, so I do know for myself I expect that my schedule can be full and my days long for some time. The difference is that I’m now working on optimizing my time to best serve my effectiveness and productivity.
I’m not successful at this each day, but every morning I start anew with an intention to do my best and keep focused on the tasks at hand.
It’s a journey not a race, and remembering why we’re entrepreneurs and why we set out to do what we do is the key to keeping on the right track. Let joy into the process. It’ll shine through the work that you just do, especially whenever you’re standing in the middle of the arena.